Week 5--Out of the Mouths of Babes

First of all, re: last week's post--rookie mistake: Capitalizing on momentum is a good thing in a given moment, but returning each room each day to the way the cleaner's left it? Uh, something good to aspire to, but anything that makes me say, "Not going to be easy" is not low-hanging fruit. However, I'm going to keep in mind momentum as a general operating principle--e.g. before ending a particular task or kind of activity, or leaving a room, think whether there is one additional thing I could do before ending.

Ditto on the "have the right food around to whip up a several-course meal without actual cooking on a moment's notice b/c your last minute guests are allergic to a key ingredient in the simple main dish you were going to serve your family".  But when shopping for Shabbat or a holiday, buying a few extra things to round out a meal just in case? Within reach.

Ok, so here's some real low-hanging fruit. I tend towards messy car. Actually, "messy" is on a good day; our family does an unfortunate amount of car eating, and the food detritus is not pretty. One of the sweet kids in our carpool said to me--yes, I'm taking decluttering advice from 10-year-olds; no, not humiliating at all, why do you ask?--"You know what my mom does? She hangs a plastic bag from the arms between the front seats." At the time, I was thinking, "Uh, thanks hon, having a bag for garbage, which I already do"--OK, not all the time--"is not exactly revolutionary advice...you must think I'm really impaired..."

But after Dr. Husband packed up a a bunch of plastic bags into one, I took it out to my minivan, put it in the trunk (the way way back), and hooked one on those seat arms. (In a car, I hasten to add, that had gotten cleaned--well, cleaned out, vacuumed and wiped; carpet cleaning is for the next round--for the school year, that was not a disaster!)

And you know what? It makes a difference. Because the trash bag is in easy reach of the driver's seat, not on the floor. It is conveniently located for the kids in the middle seat. It's even easy to reach for carpool kids in the back seat when they get out of the car--or, again, for those middle-seat kids to have trash handed up to them. Basically, it's kind of brilliant. And I've become, in short order, a fanatic about making sure all trash goes in that bag, and making sure everybody picks up trash (as well as anything else on the floor) when they get out of the car. (When it's full, it goes in with me to whatever is the next building I enter, unless it's at home in which case it goes right into the garbage can--when I get back into the car, I get another bag from the huge stash in the way way back.)

Damn, it's momentum again. The car was cleaned up, and I've found a way to keep it that way--b/c of a 10-year-old's suggestion and a bag of spontaneously-reproducing plastic shopping bags. Now that's low-hanging fruit.

Thanks, Rina.

Week 4--A New Year

Rosh Hashanah always gets the personal-change juices going.

This week's low-hanging fruit:

8. Capitalize on momentum. Momentum is like free energy from the universe, not to be squandered. If a room has, say, just been cleaned by the cleaners, don't mourn that it's going to be trashed in one evening--make a mental picture of what it looks like and put a few minutes into returning it to at least that state each night. If you're feeling unexpectedly energetic, jump up and go! Lather, rinse, repeat.

9. Be vigilant about throwing out bad things from your refrigerator, so that everything in it is potentially usable on a moment's notice, and keep a few not-spoiling-quickly no-cook edibles in your fridge (e.g. packaged guacamole--surprisingly tasty, with big chunks of avocado; goodhummus--to be jazzed up with olive oil and paprika; smoked salmon...). Plus, keep some cooked pasta around. And fresh vegetables for a salad. Because when you have, say, 5 unexpected guests for lunch, the ability to pull together a lovely meal--inspiring a 9-year-old girl to say, "You said, 'It'll just be a simple lunch'--this is simple??", which makes you melt--will make you feel very on top of things.

Oh, and keeping a frozen vegan treat around for when other guests with egg allergies stop by? Another good host moment.

Having a well-stocked kitchen can make all the difference. Yay us.

Week 3...ish

(I clearly don't have to worry about those extra 4 weeks in this 100 weeks project...they'll be eaten up here and there.)

I think I had better start numbering the "low hanging fruits that could change your (that is, my) life". Good to keep track of 'em. The roundup of previous items (this is the last time I'll do a full one, for now) will take us into this week's Dramatic Trip to the ER.

1. "Never regret, always learn". A touchstone, to which I keep returning..

2. "Eat only food that I enjoy". A small but profound example of making more space for the moment of choice. It helps.

3. "Bed by 11:00 pm". Let's just list this as a laudable goal.

4. "Drink a lot of water...". Been doing better! I abhor warm water but love cold, cold water! It can be found!

5. "Slow down [more] gradually at intersections. [Be careful to stop] before the crosswalk at a stop sign [even if no one is there]. In general, realize the ways [I often feel rushed] when I drive that don't get me there any faster..." Life is too short to do anything but drive safe.

6. "Arrive places early...instead of 'Don't be late!', remember how nice it feels to have two minutes... In general, embrace what there is for me in doing something [different]...instead of what I have to give up..."

So, I am a person who struggles with lateness. A possible combo (in mysterious proportions) of likely ADD (says my doctor), possible passive/aggressiveness against the universe in a diffuse way (as chronic lateness is often said to be), and God knows what else. I hate it, but obviously, as my mom the therapist would say, it serves me in some capacity. We're working on that stuff.

Anyway, speaking of therapy...last week, for the first time probably ever, I was EARLY. I was one minute from my therapist's office, and it was four minutes until my appointment. I was feeling prih-tee self-satisfied...thinking how nice it would feel to sit outside her office and just be for two minutes.

And then my cellphone rang. Those of you who are FB friends of mine are familiar with the bones of this story, but the really barebones version is: b/c of a restaurant error, Shana--who is allergic--had a nut exposure, and after initially subsiding symptoms, had a larger reaction which required use of an Epi-Pen and a four-hour stay in the ER. (She is fine, thank God, and handled it like a trooper.)

What's the learning here? Well, a lot of things--and Pizzeria Uno is going to be learning a thing or two from me--but the low-hanging fruit piece is:

7. Keep your phone charged, and keep chargers close at hand. (Being easily reachable meant that I could turn around immediately and pick-up Shana, who Ben had determined by phone could wait for me instead of calling 911 for an ambulance, and that I could talk to her twice on the way to make sure she was still OK waiting and knew I would be there soon.) Too often, my phone is not charged, making it not so useful for reaching me in an emergency, or for my own use in an emergency.

But since I lost my iPhone--temporarily, I hope; are you out there? (no, there's no point in calling it, it has long since lost its charge, plus I've transferred the service to a loaner)--I've been carrying the small wall charger in my purse with the borrowed phone (thanks, Harvey!), and keeping the iGo adapter in the phone so that I can use it in Ben's car as well as my own.

You know--"for want of a nail..." It's silly to let small *easy* things get in the way of using Helpful Electronic Life Tools.

I decided early on that anything that felt big and overwhelming (or multi-step and murky, or...) or made me feel anxious was not going to "live" on this blog. This is a place for bringing to mind, consolidating, and reflecting on the remarkably large group of things that can improve life and are not very hard to do--*if* we, if I, grab the opportunities for awareness and for small actions that leverage larger living better, living with more ease. So, this is not going to be an ode to disaster preparedness, for example. But it will leave me with an open question: What small things have I not been managing to do, that I really could easily be managing to do, that would make my life better?

(BTW, dear reader--if you're out there--you are warmly invited to offer your own answers to that question--whether in describing past revelations and changes or proposing future ones!)

***

[Wild: After composing and posting this blog post, and mentioning it in my FB status update, I saw that my friend Judy has posted this article

http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/2009/09/why-might-small-comfortable-changes-work-better-than-radical-steps-.html

by Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project, about why and how "small comfortable changes" can be the most effective. Quel coincidence. Excuse me while I go meditate on that.--SPF]